Uncontrollable mind.
Fake hunger pangs. Bingeing.
Fatter.
Unkempt hair.
Uglier. Geek.
Glaring sunlight through yonder window.
Disrupted sleep patterns. Sick. Running.
Palpitations.
Nonsense.
Season of regret. And then some.
You are such a monster. I hate you.
And you hate me too, I’m sure.
Sometimes you know. Call it gut feeling, instinct. You just know.
And sometimes you don’t.
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Prison Break 2.11
A: There is a way to stop this. Surrender your will to God.
B: If I surrender now, I lose everything I love.
A: But do you lose your soul in the process?
B: Well, we all have our crosses to bear.
I don’t know if I should laugh at cry at this moment, but I do think bitterly ironic sums it up rather nicely.
It almost feels illegal to be blogging now.
Given that I have a paper at 5pm. And I have been trying very hard to fall asleep since 2am (to no avail because 2am is hardly ever my bed time), I even resorted to popping my drowsiness-inducing cold medication.
The paper. 201 – Communication History and Theories.
There is so much content to cover. Worth more than its 4AUs, seriously.
Mind is very easily distracted. And youtube is a culprit.
I feel guilty to admit it here, but I’ve already planned my December schedule. Down to the smallest details. I’ve even gone as far as to make a list of “people-to-meet-up-with-in-december-before-i-leave-for-exchange”.
And I suppose nothing is more illegal than entertaining thoughts of going to sleep now huh. But I really don’t care. Even if I have to go to jail twice over. I’m going to sleep now. If you really care, gimme a wake up call, will ya?
10am is a sweet time.
Thanks in advance. 
Woke up this morning to the sound of thunder and rain on my feet through the window. And then the realization that I had laundry hanging out. Start to the day? Not good.
To add to the misery, I was feeling like shit. Light-headed, drowsy, sniffy, sore throat and stiff neck. It was a non-alcoholic hangover.
That pretty much summed up the rest of my day. Boring and pointless.
So I decided to change the look of my blog. I like it better now. Always preferred a narrower space.
Update on exchange: Offers from New South Wales and University Technology Sydney. But still waiting on Ithaca. Since I can’t get Europe, I’ll settle for USA. And not Australia. Too near. And too Singaporean.
Some back-dated photos-
national day party with nj class plus swiss guys
ting’s b’day at globetrotters
A cigarette that bears a lipstick’s traces
An airline ticket to romantic places
And still my heart has wings
These foolish things remind me of you
A tinkling piano in the next apartment
Those stumbling words that told you what my heart meant
A fairground’s painted swings
These foolish things remind me of you
You came, you saw
You conquered me
When you did that to me
I knew somehow this had to be
The winds of March that made my heart a dancer
A telephone that rings and who’s to answer
Oh how the ghost of you clings
These foolish things remind me of you
First daffodils and long excited cables
And candle lights on little corner tables
And still my heart has wings
These foolish things remind me of you
The park at evening when the bell has sounded
The ‘ile-de-france’ with all the gulls around it
The beauty that is spring’s
These foolish things remind me of you
How strange, how sweet
To find you still
These things are dear to me
They seem to bring you near to me
The sigh of midnight trains in empty stations
Silk stockings thrown aside, dance invitations
Oh how the ghost of you clings
These foolish things remind me of you
I can’t believe I let Alvin trick me into buying wholemeal bread. Not even Nutella can make it taste good.
Serene, it being a highly stressful season, I shall make an exception and allow you to laugh at me.
Here’s a picture of my carbonara/scrambled eggs.
Everyday I ask myself what am I doing studying communication. I have no idea what this is leading to. My mother seems to think that journalism is the way out. And I think that journalism in Singapore sucks. I rather work for a magazine (however trashy it may be) than to work for ST.
Projects are killing me. I am going to list them down here just for the joy of cancelling them off later.
Anyway I want to talk about lying. Last week I witnessed a friend doing something wrong. To cut it short, it involved a small lie. And well, let’s say my friend isn’t exactly a good liar, which is a good thing. Bad liars show one thing. They don’t lie too much and are uncomfortable doing so. Hence, good thing. (Buddy, please go practice more!)
I’m not going to say lying is wrong, cos we all know lying is necessary at times. “Depends on the situation” – my favorite and extremely politically correct statement. Lying is lying is lying. As black and white as it is, invariably there is also that grey. Lying is only necessary if it is harmless and eventually benefits everyone. Much like if telling the truth hurts, then a lie is the better choice.
And my friend lied to benefit no one but himself. But I probably should add that it was a harmless lie. Anyway, there is no point to this. I just wanted to get it off my chest. Sometimes it gets to me when I know of people lying for selfish reasons. And especially so if being selfless rather than selfish in certain situations is far easier. Like come on! Be smarter. Anyway, like I said, there is no point to this. So stop reading already. I am just rambling cos there’s a lot of work to be done and I can’t concentrate. Maybe there is a point here. Lie, but lie smart. Lie, and do not be caught. Lie, but do not – if you are the only one who benefits. So stop being such a selfish bastard and stop lying. Cos you have a conscience and you can tell right from wrong. That’s why you are a bad liar.
So there.
I’m feeling better already.
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